Out and about and child-free

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Twenty minutes ago I walked out of my house. With a purse containing only my wallet, keys, phone, and a laptop. No diapers or burp clothes or changes of clothes today.

I left my family at home. And there they will be for the next two hours. And here, I will be. Alone.

Well… not totally alone. I’ve got a keyboard and a cup of coffee. Fellow Starbucks patrons on this warm, January Sunday.

I still smell like milk.

The image of the three of them, smiling up at me, ready to go on for the afternoon without me, lingers in my mind as I type.

It’s their first afternoon without me in months. My first without them.

And I miss them.

But I need this time. Time to find the quiet. Time to type the words I need to type. To give those words time to breathe. No competing with cries from a baby monitor or a request for another snack.

And they need this time. Time to be that group of three. They were deeply engrossed in a book before I opened the door to leave. They have everything they need.

We’ll all be good. I feel good. Good to be out and about. Lighter.

But that’s the thing with motherhood, isn’t it? It’s so hard to stay and be there all of the time. And yet, it is also so hard to leave.

children reading

~~~~~

linking up for SOC Sunday.

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