Just like me


My dear girl,

I have something to tell you today that, by the time you read this, you may or may not want to hear.

You are so much like me.

little girl on phone

You can try to deny it. You can try to change it. I’m sure one day, you will. But, right now anyway, it is ultimately true.

It’s much harder than you might think to recognize such a thing. You might think that having your own traits, quirks, and mannerisms reflected back to you would be an obvious, can’t-miss kind of experience. But it’s not that way at all. It takes me weeks, sometimes months, to recognize the things you do as distinctly me.

But when I finally do see it, well it changes me.

You like to wake up all on your own. You prefer to slowly make your way out of slumber and into wakefulness, taking your own, sweet time and in the quiet of your own little space. Though you want me to watch nearly everything that you do, for this, you don’t want an audience. When we grant you this time, to stretch and rub your eyes into focus all by yourself, you emerge happy and ready to burst into the day. But when we intrude and sit by you, you resist and whine. You curl up and retreat.

For so long I wondered about this. I lamented the fact that you wouldn’t greet me cheerfully whenever I had to wake you; that I was better off to let you wake on your own and come to me.

But, as your daddy will attest, I’ve spent many a morning fighting him, the alarm, anything that forced me into the morning before I was good and ready.

little girl in swing

You like to be in control. You like to have people do things a certain and specific way; the one, of course, that makes the most sense to you as you reason it out in your mind. And yes, while that is a sign that you are nearly three years old, it is also a sign that you are truly my little girl.

You love to be creative but you don’t like to get your hands messy. You prefer the quiet to the loud noises. You warm up easily to some people and shy away around others. You love to be around people… sometimes. But you also crave your time alone or in a small group of those who love you most. You blossom in one-on-one interactions. Yes, we are introverts, you and me. For years, I tried so hard to be an extrovert, because I thought that is what I should be. But I’m learning, for us both, to accept and celebrate our needs to recharge in the quiet of our own spaces.

baby's feet and legs under the table

You love to dance and believe that the world is better when there is music playing nearby. You have an undeniable, and sometimes insatiable, sweet tooth.

Your anger, frustration, sadness, fear, exhaustion all come out in tears.

You nurture and take care of those you love.

I’m always honest with you and so I have to tell you, many of these things have frustrated me to no end. The slow waking, the desire to be in control, the pulling back in so many social situations. I want better for you. I want you to wake up with a smile and take the day by storm.

But I’m learning. Each time I recognize myself in you, it changes me. It changes the way I react to you and the way I see myself.

As you grow up, I hope to be able to help you make the most of these things we share. But, I suspect, you’ll help me with them more.

Keep growing, my beautiful girl.




  1. Interesting post. I am an introvert too and spent years trying to be an extrovert. Perhaps with your guidance your daughter will accept who she is earlier in her life.

    Stopping by from SITS

  2. I love reading your letters every week. I think I might do that with my future children if/when I have them.
    Leelee recently posted..A Time to ListenMy Profile

  3. What beautiful words! My daughter is a lot like me too, even when I don’t realize it (or want to ignore that some of the habits she has that bother me the most are ones that I have too). Stopping by from SITS!

  4. What a beautiful letter to your daughter. I am stopping by from Satruday Sharefest and I now I am looking forward to reading more on your blog! Have a great weekend!
    Danielle recently posted..Friday FavoritesMy Profile

  5. Beautiful! I did somewhat the same to my daughter this week! She just turned 10!
    Dropping by from Sits!
    Recreate and Decorate recently posted..Little Miss SunshineMy Profile

  6. What a beautiful post. How old is your daughter. You both seem really close. I have a daughter of my mine who is very much like her mama (so grandma says)lol.
    Stopping by from Sits.

    • Thank you! She is three and yes, right now we are close (as, I suppose, most three year olds are with their mamas). I hope we keep it this way…

  7. Your daughter will love these letters some day. And I’ve heard doctors who work with generations of women that the cliche, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree is true. Scary and excited.
    Laura @ Pruning Princesses recently posted..Teach your girl HOW to appeal your “No”My Profile

  8. I absolutely love reading your beautiful entries to your daughter. This one made me especially emotional. Wonderfully written. Something she will no doubt treasure having one day.
    thedoseofreality recently posted..Nora Ephron Made Me ThinkMy Profile

  9. Beautiful letter, Tricia. She will come to love to read this when she’s older.
    Alison recently posted..A Force of His OwnMy Profile

  10. Beautiful. It’s so interesting to see ourselves in our children if we really stop and think about it. One of my daughters is more like me and the other is more like my husband, but there are things I see in both of them that are similar to me.

    I’m stopping by from the SITS Sharefest.
    Katie E recently posted..It’s Finally Friday!My Profile

  11. Isn’t it wild to see how much our children can be like us while also not like us? This is a beautiful letter to your daughter. One day, she will see it all for herself.
    Lucy recently posted..Awake.My Profile

  12. Tricia, that is just beautiful. I love how you understand her so already. It took my mother years to “get” me. What a wonderful gift you give your daughter with your understanding.

    I wish you lived next door so we could chat about this over coffee! xo

  13. Oh, how I missed your blog the most in my week off of internetting. This post describes me and my daughter. It makes me crazy. I see in her many of my quirks and many of the things that I really dislike about myself, but I find beautiful in her. I wonder if someday she’ll love or hate those things.
    Beautiful post as always. Hope you are having a great day!
    Tara Denny recently posted..Call me Maybe?My Profile

  14. Wow, this post feels like it came straight out of my soul. I could say every one of those things – about me AND my oldest daughter! So glad I found your blog. 🙂

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